Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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