Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize