dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
