Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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