I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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