At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
This is the high leading the old right now
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
