It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
