he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
