The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize