i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
mondays should just be called national damage control day
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
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