Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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