Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
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