She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
pray to the hookup gods
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