Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
