He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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