you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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