I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
birth control should be required to get into college
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
