Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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