i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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