No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Randomize