Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
