i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
