What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
