I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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