Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
