There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
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