I wish i was in the wii world.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
