She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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