literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
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