The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize