Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
