You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Randomize
