So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
