I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
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