I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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