The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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