Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
