you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
