Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize