hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize