This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Actions speak louder than pants.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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