About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
He did a backflip because drugs
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
