I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
