Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
