I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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