you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
