Your tits are I can't wait for
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
