hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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