just tell him i said nine months
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
