Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
