i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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